Infertility is often a devastating
circumstance to trudge through. The last step in the infertility ladder is
Surrogacy. Surrogacy is when an infertile woman commissions another woman
to get pregnant for her, and carries and delivers the baby.
This process is one that has been
established by the legal system in order to avoid any doubts as to who the
parents of the baby are. For example, the embryo cannot be genetically related
to the Surrogate. In other words, the commissioning parents must have an embryo
created with their own egg and sperm or with the aid of donors. But the
donor cannot be the same woman as the Surrogate.
Surrogates are healthy women 21 to 39 years
old who have already completed at least one pregnancy. Reproductive
endocrinologists (fertility doctors) request records of previous pregnancies as
part of the pre-screening process. In order to be considered, Surrogates
must have had complication-free pregnancies. Agencies perform background
checks on all the adults in the Surrogate’s household as well as a
psychological screening, which includes a long questionnaire and an interview
with the Surrogate and her partner.
Once the Surrogate is accepted by the
fertility doctor, the Commissioning Parents and the Surrogate sign a contract, which
includes all the financial terms and in which the Surrogate gives up any rights
to the child. This contract is prepared by the Commissioning Parents’
lawyer and presented to the Surrogate’s lawyer. The clinic requires a
letter from both parties’ lawyers stating that the contract was signed, before
the clinic moves forward with treatment. The agency will make sure the
commissioning parents buy insurance on behalf of the surrogate so that there is
a health and life insurance plan in place. In addition, the agency will forward
all monies to an escrow company that will disburse all the monies per the terms
of the contract.
Surrogates have a chance to meet the
Commissioning Parents before the transfer of the embryo at a friendly
meeting. A member of Bundles of Joy, LLC, staff will be present at the
meeting to facilitate discussions about the amount of contact during and after
pregnancy, abortion, and selective reduction, etc. The relationship between the
Surrogate and the Commissioning Parents is completely open throughout the
pregnancy. Most Surrogates even welcome the Commissioning Parents to all
their OB/GYN visits and to their delivery.
After all these preliminary steps have been
trod, everything is ready to start the protocol that will prepare the Surrogate
for the transfer of the embryo into her uterus. The clinic will prepare a
calendar with clear daily instructions for both parties up until the day of the
transfer. Ten days after the transfer, it will be known if there is a chemical
pregnancy. From there, the infertility doctor will continue treatment
until he sees a heartbeat on the ultrasound. Afterwards, this becomes a
normal pregnancy where the Surrogate becomes a patient of her own OB/GYN.
Bundles of Joy, LLC, serves as a mediator
between the Surrogate and the Commissioning Parents. We want this to be a
very pleasant experience for everybody involved. We understand that the Surrogate
is doing “the heavy lifting” but all the members of her family are being
affected by her changes. We find that the Commissioning Parents are so thankful
for their Surrogate’s generosity that they do everything in their power to ease
her discomfort and to make her journey an unforgettable experience. For
this reason, most Surrogates come back and embark on more journeys down the
road.